Disclamers: No, I don't own the characters or situations of Early Edtition. I'm just a humble fanfic writer. Hey, don't you think if I owned the characters I'd be playin Spin the Bottle with Gary, not writing this. Unfortunatly, the characters and situations, and yadda, yadda, yadda, belong to CBS and Sony Tri Star, though Gary frequently stars in my dreams. Hugs and kisses to my homegirls, and to Matt, you guys are the best. None of this would be possible without you guys. Oh, and any guys who get
tommorow's newspaper today are welcome at my house any night. *grin.* blush.

Spoilers: None, unless you've been in my head at any time, scary place my mind.

My newbie: Okay, everybody pick on the freshman. Actually writing this was alot of fun and not so bad. The insane people who assigned this, [my heroes] say that being a new kid, I have to write a short story using at least three of these words, flamingo, eel, umbrella, jelly bean and flamingo.Well, hah, I used them all.  You want bizarre, here goes.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Livin La Vida Gary
by Mary Hobson

"Say, Marissa, how would you like to go flamingo dancing?"

Marissa Clark chuckled. "I think you mean flamenco dancing, Gary."

Gary Hobson looked up. "Like I said, flamingo dancing."

Marissa smiled. "Okay, why should we go flamingo dancing?"

Gary raised his eyebrows. "Apparently, Father Joe of St. Stans church, is a big dancing man. At around 7:00,  he's going to break his neck when he trips over an... eel?!"

Marissa's eyes widened. "An eel?"

Gary blinked hard, not believing what he was seeing. "Yeah. Some nut sets an umbrella full of eels into the club as a joke."

Marissa grinned. "So, what should I wear?"

They stood in front of the club, waiting to be let in. The 400-pound bouncer was not moving. He put a hand on Gary's chest. "Whoa there pretty boy. Where you think you're going?"

"Uh, dancing."

Marissa tried to conceal her laughter. "Yeah, he's trying to get his groove on."

The bouncer folded his arms. "Where's the admission?"

Gary sighed and took out his wallet. "The things I do for that paper," he muttered. "How much?"

The bouncer shook his head. "Not cash. Read the sign, farm boy." He gestured to an advirtisement.

"What?" exclaimed Gary. "Jelly bean night? Admission is one bag of Jelly Belly jelly beans?"

"Wow, farm boy can read," the bouncer mocked.

"I'll just pick some up at the store."

"All the stores are closed," the bouncer sneered. "So, it's the jelly beans, or I knock your butt back to the farm you came from. Now leave."

Gary took Marissa's arm and walked away. "And all to see some dancing flamingos." Marissa just laughed.

"I feel so stupid," Gary said, as he knotted the tie, and picked up a violin from the backstage. Gary and Marissa had snuck in the side door, and in the backstage area.

"Look, Gary, either you're a vilolinist, or Father Joe breaks his neck."

"I don't play the viloin," he grumbled. "Just pretend," Marissa said. "I'll meet you at the bar later," she added, hoping
Gary couldn't see the amused smile that spread across her face. "Heros never have it easy," she said, as an afterthought.

Gary stood on stage, scanning the crowd. It was only a matter of minutes. His eyes widened as he spotted Father Joe dancing so wildly, everyone steered clear of him. "I don't think this is what God had in mind when he called Father Joe," he remarked to himself. Then, he spotted something he knew in the morning, he'd never believe.

A young guy, about twenty years old, stood in the doorway of the club. He was painted orange and black. "Help me free the animals," he screamed. And he turned over the umbrella, eels spilling out of it."FREEEEEEEEEDOM," the man screamed.  The only person who didn't seem to notice was Father Joe, who was still dancing across the floor. His foot was about to land on
an eel, when Gary made his move. He lunged, doing the "Hobson Crusher" as his high school football coach had dubbed it. He  connected with the Father and got him out of harm's way.

"Please forgive me Father," said Gary, and he ran out the back way.

[cue opening credits]

Feedback is appreciated, a million bucks is even better. Don't shoot me, it's  my first fanfic that wasn't totally my idea. It was tons of fun making it. Thanks for reading! Remember to tell me what you think.

Email the author: Mary Hobson
 
 

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