Disclaimer: Firefly and all related elements, characters and indicia © Mutant Enemy Productions and 20th Century Fox Television, 2003. All Rights Reserved. All characters and situations—save those created by the authors for use solely on this website—are copyright Mutant Enemy Productions and 20th Century Fox Television.

Author's Note: For Rhythm. Happy birthday! The Horsechicks reviewed, and Serrico caught my Star Trek mistake. g Thanks, guys! (Belated) part of Firefly Improv #3: barren, pale, justify, live

Let Be
by Celli Lane

"I had a plan. Even the captain knew I had a plan."

"Well, you told the captain, River. You forgot to let me in on it." Simon's voice is groggy but warm. "I didn't know I was supposed to let him go."

Kaylee stands in the doorway to the infirmary, feeling as awkward as she ever has—which is very—and watches River not-fuss over Simon, brushing her hands through the air over his wound without actually touching it. "'All the world is bitter as a tear,'" she says. "He shot you."

"He punched me too. And then he kicked me."

River's eyes widen, and Kaylee winces for her, but Simon takes River's hand and lays it over his heart. "I thought you were leaving me, mèimei," he says. "I had to."

"I had a plan," she says stubbornly, and he laughs just a little.

"I won't doubt you again, River. 'Come hence, let be, lie still; it is enough.'" And he sounds like River for a moment there. But she smiles back at him.

"Be nice," she says, and stands up.

She passes Kaylee on the way out and pats her shoulder. "'Love is a barren sea, bitter and deep.'"

"It is?" But River is already gone.

"Kaylee," Simon says, and his voice is nearly as kind as it was when he spoke to River. "I haven't had a chance to say thank you yet."

"What did you say to her?" she asks. Just a few minutes before he has to hate her, is it so much to ask?

"What?"

"Come hence? You don't talk like that."

"Oh." A blush tips his cheeks, and it's a relief after how pale he was when Zoe finished with him. "It's an old poem. One of my favorites. I was reading it before—a few days ago, and River must have seen it." His smile dims a bit. "It makes me think of her, you see."

Kaylee inches closer. "Why?"

"'Though we sang as angels in her ear, she would not hear.'" He closes his eyes. Kaylee feels her throat seize up.

"Simon, I gotta tell you something," she blurts before she's too scared.

"Hm?"

He doesn't open his eyes, and it should be easier this way. "I told Early where you were."

"You what?"

"In the engine room. He said—" beatingheartbeenraped sayitunseemlymannerHURTYOU "Don't matter what he said. He asked where River slept and I told him."

Simon's eyes are open now, and the look in them is so dark she stumbles back a step. Then another expression crosses his face. "What did he say, Kaylee?"

"Don't matter." She's shaking again.

"When he came in, River was gone." He sits up a little, and winces when it jolts his leg. But his eyes don't move from hers. "He told me that if I didn't help him find her, first he'd blow my brains out. Then he'd go back to the engine room. He said he would rape you before he killed you."

"Oh. Oh." The Simon she knew before today wouldn't have been able to say that word to her face.

"Is that why you told him?"

"He said not—not to interfere at all." There's no one that can help me. "Or he'd come back."

"And yet you got free and let the captain out."

"River told me to. When she was being Serenity."

"She's persuasive."

"Don't smile at me!" Simon's expression goes to a shocked blank. "Don't be nice to me. Don't justify it. I told him where you slept, Simon. I shoulda lied, shoulda said somewhere else—"

"Kaylee. Come here."

She shakes her head miserably.

"Kaylee, if I have to get up and chase you across this room it'll hurt my leg. Do you want me to hurt my leg?"

She inches closer. He reaches out and grabs her hand, tugs until she's sitting where River was earlier.

"If you'd lied to him, he would have kept his word. He would have gone back and hurt you. We both know it."

"...sold you out," she says through the shaking of her shoulders.

"You saved us. River's plan would have failed if you hadn't freed the captain. You helped."

She can't stop the crying now, and shrugs his arms off when he tries to hold her. "You could have died 'cause of me. And they'd take River away and cut her brain again."

"I'm okay. River's okay. Bao bei, shh."

She cries until her hair sticks to her face from the tears and the front of his shirt is wet. But finally the sound of his heart against her ear is louder than her hiccupy breaths.

"I'm so sorry," he says finally. "I'm sorry he scared you, Kaylee."

"I'm sorry I told on you," she says, and he smiles.

"Then we're even, I suppose."

"I can live with that."

He kisses the top of her head. "'Come hence. Let be. Lie still...'"

"'...it is enough,'" she finishes. And she supposes it is.

Translation Notes